So Happy!

Not too long ago I did a post about my new Relief Society Calling as Chorister. I was so nervous and inexperienced at first that after I lead the first song I sat down and cried. I dreaded every song we sung until one day I happened to pass by the primary room where I saw my 7 year old daughter fearlessly leading the children in song. She had hoped I'd somehow see her and she gave me the faith and courage to be the best inexperienced conductor that I could be.

Eventually I lost my nerves and became somewhat comfortable in front of the sisters. My technique never really improved even though a sweet sister would track me down every Sunday (she'd even follow me into the bathroom) to give me a conducting lesson.

I planned out the songs we would sing until April and I tried to match them up as best I could with the lessons that would be taught. I also had to give a little background on our practice hymn each Sunday. I loved doing this because it was fun to see how the music we sing came to be.

Today I was released from the calling as chorister. Can you see the big smile on my face? I was called to be the Second Sunday Relief Society Teacher instead and I can't tell you how overjoyed I am. I love to teach. I have been teaching in some capacity or other since I was 17 years old and I feel I owe my testimony and knowledge of the gospel to the countless hours of preparation for church lessons.

Do you want to know what else makes me super happy? It was the way I left my calling as chorister. I can say that I did my best. Even though I hadn't the first idea how to lead music, I did it every Sunday. I even learned to (almost) enjoy it. I could have complained every Sunday or found excuses to have someone else lead. But I didn't. I squared my shoulders, planted my feet and fulfilled the calling that Heavenly Father asked me to do even though, at first I felt like I would rather die. I feel like I can be proud of myself because I did what the Lord asked of me.

Isn't it funny that I should like teaching better than leading the music? I think in all callings the following statement is true " The Lord doesn't need our ability, he needs our availability and if we then prove our dependability, he will then increase our capability."

To My Friends Through The Years . . .

I am horrible at keeping in touch. I always have been. I don't know why I haven't worked harder to rectify that horrible trait. Even now with so much technology at my finger tips I find myself with little time to check blogs or compose emails. But I wanted to make this known to anyone who still checks my blog:

From my good friends in La Habra from church and school, to roommates who became more like sisters in Laie both in the dorms and on The Point, to classmates and carpool buddies that I survived my education with, to families and couples we shared our lives with in TVA and our married ward, to friends from Logandale and Mesquite with who I have parted ways . . . perhaps I am horrible at keeping in touch and our lives have twisted and tuned down different paths but your memories live on strongly in my mind. I have the gift of imagination and though it may be a poor excuse, perhaps that is why I am so bad at keeping in touch. When I think about someone, memories so vivid and bright rush to the forefront of my mind and I get the gift of living fond memories and events over and over. I know I need to improve. I have been blessed to have known so many wonderfully gifted people in my life. So many of you have touched me and forever left your mark.

I want to apologize for not keeping in touch. I also want you to know that I have never forgotten you and that it might surprise you to know how many times you are on my mind.
I am feeling nostalgic lately and I wanted to share my feelings in hopes that it might do you good to know that you are remembered, but more than that, you are loved.